Considering the CDC changed mask guidelines for vaccinated people again last week, we decided to feature another personal look into the lives of families struggling to make school decisions for this fall. Maybe this feels like a story that’s been on repeat for you. Maybe you are tired of the debates and discussions over “what’s right or wrong.” No matter where you are this morning, we ask you to set aside the political debates and listen to the heart of a parent, struggling with school decisions that are far from straightforward. Meet Lauren Delmer.

In some ways, Lauren’s decision making has been much easier than many parents during the COVID pandemic. As a part-time writer, she already had a structure for working at home and has not required a full-time daycare situation. So, when preschool options seemed confusing and less than consistent in the fall of 2020, she rearranged her work and life to care for her toddler and pre-k aged child at home.

Her son’s birthday is after September 1st, so developmentally he straddles the school cut-off. Lauren decided, “Why not use this year for some pre-k learning without any pressure?” Knowing that he would repeat pre-k the next fall, they could enjoy learning together without any pressure to reach standardized end-of-grade milestones. 

Looking back over the past year, the juggle of working from home and homeschooling was challenging but rewarding for Lauren. Work and school were never interrupted by classroom quarantine or even sick kids. As the world opened and closed and debated masks, Lauren and her children woke up, ate breakfast, had calendar time, storytime and daily activities without interruption. They went on field trips to the zoo and the apple orchard and attended a Friday forest school outside while children in school remained in their homeroom seats, rather than mix with students in other classes in the lunchroom.

Even vacation trips away from “school” were easier to schedule. The family took a vacation to “Great Wolf Lodge” on a random Tuesday, and they enjoyed nearly the entire place to themselves. “I remembered thinking that we would play it safe and order room service instead of eating at the large breakfast buffet during COVID, but I went downstairs to get a cup of coffee and realized there was not a single other person eating at the buffet.”

Everything was not easy however. Lauren had not originally planned to homeschool, so planning the structure and lessons was a last minute endeavor and sometimes overwhelming along with her regular work. “More than anything, I was always juggling a professional mindset with an elementary school teacher mindset. I had very little time to think about anything else. I felt like I was ‘on’ constantly, and I didn’t get a lot of sleep.”

So, even after what felt like a “pretty good year” for their family, considering the circumstances, Lauren and her husband reevaluated in May and decided to send their kids back to a traditional half day preschool. But now, with fall looming, the decision does not feel so straight forward.

Their county has just now hit a 30% vaccination rate, and it does not seem to be trending upward very quickly. Both children are too young for vaccinations, and their older son has reactive airways disease. He frequently requires breathing treatments when he catches a regular cold. “I know the risk for children is low,” admitted Lauren, “but when the preschool has no covid policies  - no masks, no spacing, no special cleaning - and I remember the consistency and my family’s overall quality of life last fall, I fear it’s selfish to take the risk and send them to preschool. Besides, I’ve been that parent waiting for a chest x-ray. I don’t wish that on anyone.”

Her description of school decisions highlights many of the pros of homeschooling - the ability to tailor rigor, the flexibility regarding when structured education happens, and even the unique experiences available outside the classroom. Watching a family debate the details of how an education system affects daily life is a strong reminder that parents are their children’s biggest advocates. Why would we believe that bureaucrats, who have never met our children, would know them better or want better for them than their parents do?

If you are a parent worried about what is best for your child’s education, take comfort that worrying about your child is a sign of good parenting. And you should have the authority to make choices on your child’s behalf. It may not always be clear which choice is best for your child, but no one cares more about or worries more about your child than you. That’s the main reason that parental school choice works well for so many families.